Parenting is a journey. A hard, yet rewarding and precious journey. If you are a parent and you’re doing your best, we applaud you. As parents, we know that keeping our children safe and teaching them to be good people is extremely important. Studies show that children who feel loved and have discipline, grow up to be successful and exude confidence. Verywell.com posted an article, based on scientific research, about the 4 different parenting styles. So, let’s have some fun and see if you fit into one of the four parenting styles.
Authoritarian Parenting
You might be an authoritarian parent if any of these statements sound like you:
- You believe your children should be seen, not heard and their opinion is not super important to you.
- When it comes to rules, your children better listen to you with no exception or they will be punished. It’s your way, always.
- You don’t take your children’s feelings into consideration.
Authoritarian parents believe kids should follow the rules without exception. They are not very into letting kids get involved in problem-solving challenges or obstacles. They raise their kids to follow rules without question and be obedient. They don’t allow their kids to make mistakes and when they do make mistakes, they are always punished.
They also don’t allow kids to get involved in problem-solving challenges or obstacles. Instead, they make the rules and enforce the consequences with little regard for a child’s opinion. They are not interested in negotiating, either.
Kids who grow up with strict authoritarian parents usually follow rules most of the time, but they struggle with low self-esteem. They may also struggle with aggression and display hostile behavior. They usually become good liars because they lied their way out of so many scary punishments.
Authoritative Parenting
Do the following statements sound like you?
- You try your hardest to have a positive and relationship with your children and it’s important for you to be a god role model and leader.
- You explain the reasons behind your rules and have a purpose for them.
- You enforce your rules and give consequences but you take your child’s opinion into consideration.
If so, you may be an authoritative parent. Authoritative parents establish clear rules but allow for reasonable expectations to the rules and are willing to discuss things with their children.
“Authoritative parents often use logical consequences that teach life lessons. They also use positive discipline to prevent behavior problems and to reinforce good behavior. So they may be more likely to create reward systems and praise good behavior.”
Children who grow up with authoritarian parents usually turn out to be successful and happy, knowing their worth and value. They’re more likely to be good at making decisions and evaluating safety risks on their own.
Permissive Parenting
You may be a permissive parent if any of these statements sound like you:
- You try to set rules but then rarely enforce them.
- You don’t usually give out consequences.
- You hardly ever interfere in your child’s life.
They tend to only interfere when there’s a serious problem. They quite lenient, forgiving and give into begging. They are usually seen by their child as more of a friend than a parent. They encourage their children to talk to them and open up but they don’t put much effort into discouraging poor choices or bad behavior.
Kids who grew up with permissive parents usually struggle academically. This may be from a lack of being taught by their parents. They may have behavioral problems and have a hard time following authority and rules. They often have low self-esteem and rank high on the sadness scale.
“They’re also at a higher risk for health problems, like obesity, because permissive parents struggle to limit junk food intake. They are even more likely to have dental cavities because permissive parents often don’t enforce good habits, like ensuring a child brushes his teeth.”
Uninvolved Parenting
Do any of these statements sound like you as a parent?
- You don’t ask you child about their day.
- You don’t tell your child to do their homework.
- You rarely know where your child is at or who they are with.
- You don’t think about or make an effort to spend quality time with your child.
If they do, then you might be an uninvolved parent. Uninvolved parents are just that; uninvolved. You won’t often find them at their child’s sports games or volunteering at their school bake sale. Children of uninvolved parents basically raise themselves. Uninvolved parents don’t spend much time trying to meet their child’s basic needs. Their poor kids are neglected may experience loneliness.
Parents may be this way because of mental illness or substance abuse, which causes it to be nearly impossible to effectively raise their child.
In other situations, parents may lack knowledge about child development. And sometimes, they’re simply overwhelmed with other problems, like work, paying bills, and managing a household.
Uninvolved parents hardly know what their kids are up to. Their kids don’t really receive the guidance and nurturing they require.
“When parents are uninvolved, children struggle with self-esteem issues. They tend to perform poorly in school. They also exhibit frequent behavior problems and rank low in happiness.”
As a parent, you might not fit into just one category. You might be an authoritative parent at times and a permissive parent at other times. Studies are clear that authoritative parenting is the best style for a child.
“With dedication and commitment to being the best parent you can be, you can maintain a positive relationship with your child while still establishing your authority in a healthy manner. And over time, your child will reap the benefits of your authoritative style.”
